the only dreams i ever have are bad. i haven’t had a normal dream in so long i can’t even remember. somebody is always out to kill me in my dreams. that or just completely sabotage me.
last night i had a dream that i was living in an upstairs apartment somewhere. somehow one of the rooms in the apartment had caught fire. when the fire department came, they began hosing down the room that was on fire. when the fire was put out, i thought it was over, but i heard the firemen talking about hosing down my room. at the time, my room was full of papers and writing, and it was very cluttered. however, i knew somehow that all the pages and folders were important to me, and i asked the firemen why they needed to hose down a room that was so far from where the fire was. furthermore, i asked why they needed to hose anything else down, seeing as the fire had already been put out. they seemed to be ignoring me, but at the same time i could sense that they weren’t so much interested in making sure the fire was completely out, they seemed more interested in messing up what i was doing. without warning, they stormed in my room and delivered a blast from the hose on all my paperwork and my folders. i screamed with rage. i tried to make them stop, and they would not. once they had made a sufficient mess of what i was doing, they left. the dream ended with me trying to gather my papers and my folders to see what could still be salvaged.
i don’t know what this means. i never have the slightest clue what my dreams mean. all i know is that they are never good. somebody is always trying to attack me or fuck with me.
of course, i feel like that in real life, so maybe i have answered my own question here.